Yesterday I read a blog about an adoptive puppy turned 8 year old dog who terrorized his owner by attacking various innocent people and dogs for nearly a decade.
The owner finally found the ability within herself to do the right thing, and she had the dog she loved euthanized following a day of fun and love. Peacefully, he went over the Rainbow Bridge never knowing a bad day, and his reign of terror on his owner and those around him ended.
This was a first world problem, really. Only in very fortunate places on the planet can someone spend 8 years tormenting themselves over trying to decide what to do with an aggressive pet. . .or a sick pet. . .or pets that have no where to go for various and very real reasons.
I’m thankful for that. . .but we do have to recognize it is a luxury many in the world will not be offered or even be able to understand.
“I want to save Dogs.”
“Puppies.”
“Kittens.”
“Foals.”
“Roosters. . .”
The line of would be rescuers grows longer the more I browse the comments on Social Media beneath images of various woebegone creatures on my newsfeed. Heck, half of the time, it is under a photo of the bedraggled creature I’ve assisted in rescuing.
Yet Save has such a strange interpretation among animal lovers, advocates and activists.
I find It harder and harder to understand some of the versions of what “Rescue” and “Save” mean to people these days.
Six or so years ago, a vet told me the story of a rescue group that is quite large not especially far from us. The doctor was dismayed at the number of animals being kept for years on end in crates and pens. These animals were highly unadoptable either due to behavioral or physical issues. Not only were these animals unadoptable (in his words) but it was being proven out with each passing year because they were not being adopted. The animals were not only unadoptable (some will debate what that means regardless), this vet felt the conditions were not humane. . .either because of the extreme behaviors these animals were trying to cope with while living in little cells or because their medical conditions made life quality poor. This rescue organization was rendered almost useless year after year because they refused to ever let a single animal go with a peaceful end to have space to then save those with a viable chance at adoption – those were turned away, instead.
Somehow this organization felt the animals facing each day in mental anguish or physical pain over and over again made more kind sense than just being gone.
How can that ever be? How do we consign this as a real answer to anything? Isn’t it really more a lack of action?
How can we live in a society where we know when people become very sick, either mentally or physically, so many speak openly of wishing to just be at peace, but we deny this dignity to animals over and over again when we can help them?
Before I go further, there are a few things we should agree on or you are going to feel this blog was a horrible waste of your time:
*** Animals, while feeling and loving beings, are not humans dreaming about tomorrow. Animals live in the here and now. They are instinctual creatures craving the ability to come and go at their leisure, painfree with plenty of food and without fear in their “Today.”***
I can agree to disagree if you feel otherwise.
We’ve developed a society of severe blacks and whites. Extremes that lead to detriments where one side or both suffer, but who cares. . .we have an agenda, right?
To keep life going at all costs. . .forever? Because, you know, forever here does not work. It is going to end, eventually, for that dog, cat or turtle (though the turtle has a more viable chance at outliving you, for sure).
We have crossed the line. People somehow feel we have the right to interfere up to the point of making the call to say this degree of suffering is too much and it has to end for a companion animal. Yet they feel we can interfere with life to keep it going, just not to let it go.
I mean. . . who remembers the horse with his eyes, ears and most of his face mauled off, his skin mostly gone over large portions of his body. . .but it made people feel cheerful to “save” him. Save him? No. That isn’t a fair use of the word. To keep him alive. That is what happened. And people loved it. It broke my heart.
Moving on,
It begs the question, when the vast majority of Americans believe in a wonderful afterlife in Heaven (and if not that, others accept death as a peaceful lack of being), why is simply “not being” so hysterically feared by us for dogs, horses and cats (and ourselves when we are healthy, but that is another story). The only answer, whatever you come up with, is based in the selfish and not in compassion.
I’ve seen neglect and abuse. . .I’ve witnessed enough of what really should be feared and hated, so I cannot despise a peaceful end the way so many pet owners do, the way too many in rescue do. Further, I’ve had an aging parent explain to me day in and out how much he wanted to just “Go on,” and that stays with me. I wish it stayed with more folks.
Where is this going?
We rescue. We own pets.
We hold on too long and do so cruelly with good intentions. But good intentions do not matter to the pet. At all.
How many starving horses I’ve picked up from owners with good intentions. They made a mistake. Horrible Mistakes. Rescues and otherwise good pet owners make mistakes, as well.
If you are a pet owner and are holding your dog or cat together with glue, paper clips and weekly vet visits, who are you doing that for because it certainly isn’t the for the animal you say you love.
If you are a rescuer with dogs waiting for 2 years in a crate 23 hours a day for a home because his behaviors, fears or health make him unadoptable, who are you holding him for because that choice you are making isn’t for the animal.
How many dogs will be pulled out of a loud, crowded cell in a facility to be killed (because in many animal control shelters, what happens isn’t peaceful euthanisia) after waiting for a home never knowing real kindness (because for over 2 million, that home isn’t coming this year) when a rescue that has no space to pull and hold for an adopter could still pull that cat or dog, love him or her for a small bit of time with good food and a quiet environment and then let that animal go having known “rescue” for a bit of time and a peaceful end. Well, who wants to do that? No one, it seems.
Standing at an auction letting horses be loaded up on semi trucks heading over to Mexico while we complain there was no space, there were no homes. . .while the horses head on down to have their skulls haphazardly fractured, are hung upside down, bleed out and go in boxes because we have no holding space and donors will not fund pulling and euthanizing – isn’t a call we make for the horses’ benefit, folks.
What does our Lack of Action really say about Rescue?
The rescue world need more rescuers with fortitude, not afraid of a peaceful end or afraid of breaking idealisms – we need rescuers determined to end actual suffering.
Keeping hoping for an ideal world, but Work in the Real World.
END actual suffering, folks. . .
Good article, in terrible need of a good proofread and corrections, though. Makes a lot of sense, I’ve had these thoughts before, as to: What really is “rescue”?
Ha! You are right. My handy editor (volunteer) who always proofs was in Texas on vacation, and I can’t seem to effectively proof my own writing
The hell with a proofreader. Write away. The content is what is important and it was an important article.I pray with each dog I make the right choice for them when the time comes.
As a blogger myself , I know we often write quickly and with passion 🙂 My husband is my ” proofer” because no matter how hard I try.. I see what I meant to say; not always what is actually written. Thus far I have not had any Monday morning quarterbacks ” grading me” for that I am grateful and if I get one ….. well I shall think charitable thoughts 🙂
No one can, so don’t feel bad. It was a very insightful article. Really made me think about putting an animal down.
It is a blog….not a thesis, hope that made Denise feel better.
I am a rescuer and am often at odds with those who save for the sake of saving and those who save because we can get a good home. How many great dogs do not make it out of the shelter because the one emotional rescue comes up but the dog is completely unadoptable because of a behavior issue but it fills an emotional void for the rescuer. Are rescuers saving for themselves or the dog? (rhetorical)
To offer the obvious answer to your question—we make “saving” decisions for ourselves, of course. How many people have said that having an animal euthanized was the hardest thing they ever had to do? That’s our baggage, not the animal’s. Admittedly, it is not an easy thing to do, but there are few instances where we don’t know that it’s the right thing to do. Even “no kill” shelters humanely euthanize animals who are too sick or too aggressive to live with other animals and humans. In the case of severe and unending illness, the choice is obvious. In the case of behavior that resists even human love and the companionship of other animals, the decision is a matter of kindness that saves the animal from facing a lonely life, not giving or receiving love. So often this is the result of another human’s callousness, but it is still a gift to the animal. We can only strive to have the strength to make the right decision when we cannot repair the wrong decisions of others.
THANK YOU !!!! I have worked in animal rescue as a dog trainer and can tell you some dogs are just not rehabable! It is far much kinder to send their spirit free. Please no responses of the exception, of course there are exceptions , but as the word implys they are the exception, not the rule ,if a positive reward based method of training with a qualified trainer has proved unsuccesssful, think of the community , other animals and yourself , most of all think about the quality of life for your “beloved ” pet . It’s people holding onto dangerous pets that don’t open room for all the good natured souls needing a home. Everytime your “dangeerous” pet causes a problem you turn more than one person off to adopting . People in rescue need to be educated and not just lead with their hearts,we have a responsibility to the community and the breed or animal we choose to work with !
As a trainer and rescue volunteer, too, I agree with your every word. I am giving the article a standing ovation, as soon as I can get three of our rescue dogs off my lap! I want to find out how to get that article on my FACEBOOK page!
So true. What a beautiful article. I’m sad to see that there are so few replies. Meaning it’s not getting out there. Or is it? I worked as a hospice nurse for many years. And myself and my family has gained a true respect for quality of life and a peaceful death. I’ve always felt that those 2 things should outshine everything else. Without a quality of life, what exactly is the point of ours or the animal’s existence? (And I mean “quality of life” in 2 different contexts as it applies to humans (pain free, happy, love, dreams, energy, etc) vs animals (pain free, able to stretch, run, eat, etc). Thank you for pointing this out. It needs to be spoken about over and over again. We need to get the message.
Thank you!
I loved your blog. I recently had my beautiful schnauzer euthanased, when all around me friends and family were saying he was OK. Only I could see that he wasn’t enjoying his life. He spent every minute of the day with me and it was a decision made with complete love.
Nan was a Vet tech for 40 plus years , I sat in the hospital with my Mom & Her Mother. The Doctor told her we need to do exploratory surgery. Nan said “No” ! Doctor replied, with out it you will die . She looked at him and said ” I am at peace with my maker ” . The Doctor said ok, you understand you will Die ? Yes was her reply. He walked out of the room. Nan turned her head to me and quietly said to me, If I was a dog , you’d just put me down now ! Nan knew my heart was as hers, we would rather suffer the pain of helping the ill move on then watch them ( animals) suffer ! Nan suffered 14 days before her last. She was right I would have helped her that 1st day. It would have crushed me, but was worst to watch her struggle. Hospice are Angels on Earth.
I am in a group where I know it was read by at least 100 folks, on my blog, the comments have gone down. Used to be a lot of lively forum type discussion, but these days people read and move on.
Very well written article. It just showed up on my FB feed. Well worth a read. It made me stop and think about animals for whom I have been involved in “end of life moments”. I think that I have been pretty fair with them. Probably the worse one was my youth horse, but, I promise you, the moment I saw the love of life light vanish from her eyes, I called the vet.
Thank you, Sharon.
Oh gosh, what a great article. I am a veterinarian, and a few years ago I worked with a woman and her aggressive dog. She tried everything she could, and after two years, she finally euthanized him. It was a tough time for her.
When she was ready for another dog, she did go go the local shelter. They called me for a reference and asked about the previous dog. They were very skeptical that euthanasia had been the best choice for that dog. In the end, they turned this woman away. She would have given a dog a great home and she was told no. She had this experience with several other organizations and finally bought a dog from a breeder.
It is a shame we can’t see that euthanasia is the gift that it is.
Thank you. I do hate to hear something like this happened to a client through rescues. Unfortunately, I hear it too often.
Thank you. When the time i;s right one has to be kind [lovely] to the dog not be selfish. We have a lot of good story, BUT not many people want to talk or do what is the kindest for all
I believe this happens too often. It has happened to me and I have known others to whom it has happened. I’ve known many people who have been denied a rescue animal because they did not have the money to have a fence built or because they lived alone and worked at full-time jobs. All they could give to the animal was all of their free time and a life full of love. I admire the work done by rescues but I think that maybe too often they go overboard in their desire to do the right thing and make value judgments that deny people who fervently want companion animals. Can anyone say that a loving human companion cannot provide a good home even on a property that does not have a fence?
Compassion should always be a key reason for animal rescue. Unfortunately, that is not the case. I, for one, do not believe in “playing god” with an innocents life. Perhaps they will survive only to struggle to overcome the everyday pain that will remain with them throughout their life. For me, that is not compassion, it is the delusion of “saving their life”. In recent years, it has become more difficult to donate to some who obviously post an animal that should be surrendered to peace. Yet, the animal is used to raise thousands of dollars for treatment and then sometimes you never see the animal progress or get adopted. Meanwhile, if people put that money to use to spay/neuter clinics, gelding clinics, food banks, hay banks, medicine accounts, lobbying for better laws, the list goes on and on, it could truly make a difference. I love animals..but I have become very cautious as to where my donations go. Heart of Phoenix, you guys ROCK!
Thank you!
How can I put this article on my FACEBOOK page?
There should be a share button, Barb. Thanks!
This is beautiful. I very recently had a family dog die–it was the dog of my childhood, and yet, when people tell me they’re sorry for my loss, I am not. I am relieved. We got that dog, who as a puppy was six months old in late 1999. It was time for him to go and had been time for over two years. I begged my mother to put him down because, quite simply, his quality of life was not high. I think of it in terms of what you’ve said here–if it was an adult, we wouldn’t want them to suffer the way we allow animals too. This is a very insightful and starkly honest point of view. Thank you for sharing it.
Thank you for this article, this has resonated soundly with me. I work in a kennel and we occasionally get the sad dog that should have been put down a while ago and it is always the saddest thing. We see dogs that cannot get up by themselves, have no desire to eat, and are oozing out of every orifice out of sickness and lack of control, yet owners insist their dogs can go out there and play or have a walk…there is no joy in that animal’s lives.
While it is a shame that millions of perfectly adoptable animals are being put down, I think it’s acceptable to, some extent, destigmatise euthanasia. That aggressive dog is not happy when it’s constantly frenzied and stressed out, no more than you are happy when their safety is threatened.
Thank you, thank you, thank you for being a “voice of reason” in the insanity that has become “rescue”.
I was an ACO for 20 years and very active in purebred rescue. Now, I find it very, very hard to find a “rescue” I can support. So sad. Those of us who truly love animals more than feeling like a “hero” need to take rescue back.
Thank you for healing a long broken heart. We put a rescued GSD down last year due to severe aggression issues. I’ve been beating myself up until now because I loved the dog in spite of his dangerous nature. He runs free now and a great burden has been lifted from my heart .
Excellent article! I only wish humans in every country and state had the same options. Being of Boomer age, I’ve had to euthanize many animals in my life, to end their suffering. It was always a peaceful passing. When an animal is suffering, prolonging the torture of life is nothing less than cruel. Now, as the end of my life looms, and pain is often unbearable, I only wish I had the same options my animals were given. Death, as a release from agony, is simply a gift. Quality of life trumps quantity.
Very well written. I had to make the decision to have my 3 dogs euthanized within a year and a half of each other. They were the 1st dogs I ever had, having grown up in an apartment and it was the most difficult thing to do. I’m sure we waited a little long with the 1st but he’d go back & forth having good days & bad, it’s just so hard to know what to do sometimes. But they were all rescues, as are our 2 now. They’re some of the lucky ones at least to make it out of the shelter & live long spoiled lives. ❤️
Excellent article. Animal rescue is in need of a movement toward compassion coupled with pragmatism. No one wants to be “responsible” for the death of an animal, but very few people are actually willing to take on the responsibility of an animal’s life…and all that involves beyond just extending a lifespan.
Stellar article. Long overdue comments on how considering euthanasia for the animals
that just can’t, don’t and won’t respond to any form of rehab is most definitely a First
World problem. I’ve made similar comments on how people become insensible about
not putting down the animals who are not happy to be unable to live at peace with
others. I put my beloved dog down when he bit someone because I saw in his eyes
that he was miserable about having done it but knew he had no control to prevent
it from happening again as a victim of canine PTSD due to being a rescue from only
God knows what and from who. As soon as it was practicable I escorted him to the
Rainbow Bridge, but did not expose him to others between the time of the bite and
and time I said I’ll see you again on the other side. It’s the only responsiBULL thing to do.
It’s what I advocate on my community/page Pibble – PAWSitively Inspiring Bully Breed Lovers Everywhere.
Lovely article, kindly written. I was a vet tech for 45 years… so many people were so thankful for MY kind words at a tough time, my “speech” to them was, “this the last kind thing you can do” and we would criy together. I always said a silent prayer over everyone.
We can never “save” anything. All we’re doing is postponing death. Death is not so bad. But we Americans will not deal with it. Look at all the people who refuse to deal with death, especially their own.
I agree with you that those so-called rescues who “save” animals just to keep them alive in cages would do better to let those animals go and spend their resources actually rescuing animals that can be rehabbed and adopted.
I know of a horse rescue here in PA that “rescued” a young pony that had metabolic issues and laminitis. The rescue needed $2,000 a month to pay for the meds needed for this pony. What for? That $2,000 a month could have saved so many more ponies!
Or an owner who kept a two-year-old alive that had foundered so badly it needed special shoes and meds so that it could be pasture sound for the rest of its life? Put the poor thing down!
I fostered a dog that the owners gave up at 11 years old because it snapped at their four-year-old child. The poor dog had severe arthritis, laryngeal paralysis, separation anxiety, isolation distress, and resource guarded water of all things. The owners didn’t follow through on pain meds or acupuncture or anything else. Neither their vets nor mine suggested a cheaper pain med than either Rimadyl or Deramaxx. She ate two of my doors, I couldn’t leave her alone in the house and she wouldn’t stay outside with me. I couldn’t leave her with anyone. I had to take her everywhere with me. I gave her eight months of pain meds, melatonin, and a Thundershirt. Then I put her down. Her owners should have done that.
Thank you. There are things that are worse than death.
I ALWAYS say this! 🙂
Well said. I hope this does get a conversation started.
As a former rescuer and a pet owner who just let her horse go, THANK YOU. I wish more understood.
Rescue is different to different people. Some like to rescue animals that are easy to rescue so they would be able to rescue a large number of animals. Others rescue those that nobody in their right mind wants and those could be argued are the real rescues. Some will spend thousands for medical work for one animal that could be spent on many animals that would live years longer. While others won’t spend a dime on behavior modification. I have a cat that lived for months kenneled because it was thought he might have diabetes though it turned out he did not have diabetes. How long would have been too long for him to wait? 4months, 12months? Where do you draw the line? Everybody draws the line differently.
Due diligence is needed in various ways and areas. But in the end, the choice to draw the line somewhere different doesn’t change that the right time to let go of an animal really is static to the animal. That is truly not a grey area. Suffering or quality of life cannot be “grey”. . .it is only that for the person, us, yet rescue is not about the person. All too often, we see it becomes about us and not them. . .assuming reasonable due diligence has taken place.
just fyi, this is gonna be a long comment …
i have truly rescued a number of dogs and cats … and just in the last couple of years have had to give that peaceful release to 2 of my own personal animals because they were elderly and their quality of life was gone. it hurt very much to let them go, but we had to choose the kind option rather than the selfish one.
it would have been so easy to tell the vet to run those tests on Bandit (who was my last link to my dad and also the first animal i rescued) even knowing there was very little chance he would ever recover. but that would have been the selfish choice. to put him in the animal hospital (an environment he always hated) and have him under sedation (which was the only way he wasn’t experiencing undue discomfort) and let them pull blood and all that they would have had to have done. the vet was trying to push us to do all that, but … that would not have been for him, that would have been for me and my mom and my sister. and it just wasn’t fair to put him through all that when the outcome was almost certain that he wouldn’t recover. so we set him free. Bandit was 16 when we let him go, up until that last day, he’d been happy and healthy and had lived the life any dog would dream of.
and my first cat that i rescued was the same situation, except it was far more subtle. he just started losing weight for no reason we could tell. vets told us that he had hypothyroidism, even though he never showed any test results proving that diagnosis. and he never showed any positive test results for any of the other diagnoses we were given for his weight loss. we changed foods to see if he’d begin to gain weight, tried medicines that were supposed to help, and nothing helped. even after he’d gotten so skinny we could count his bones (definitely a 1 on the wellness scale, which is that he was beyond emaciated), the vets … and there were at least 4 of them we took him to … they all were unwilling to give him the release we believed he needed. they were all “try this, it should help” or “try that, it’ll make him better ” … we finally had to tell them that unless there was a test that would tell us FOR SURE what was wrong, it was well past time for him to be set free from the body that was betraying him. i knew 2 months before we finally found a vet that would give him the release he needed that this wasn’t something we could fix and it killed me every day to watch him suffer because the damned vets didn’t want to give up on him. while it actually hurt me inside to watch him suffer day after day with no relief the way he was. our problem with my poor dear Spooky was that the vets wanted so much to “save” him that they were hurting him by denying him what we asked them to provide. it was about a month after we finally managed to get my Spooky his peace that i found out what was actually probably wrong with the body he’d been trapped in. and it’s so unbelievably common, but no vet we saw with him ever came up with this answer. it was that his pancreas has stopped making an enzyme that his body needed to process ANY nutrition at all. if we had known to have the vets test his pancreatic enzyme levels, things might have been different, but … we didn’t. so, things went they way they did. he was 15 years old and he’d been with me since he was 6 months old.
the best i can do now is to tell people: if your cat starts losing weight for no reason, is eating like they’re starving to death, tests negative for all the most common ailments for an elderly cat, and their poo has a really weird/off smell to it … have your vet test the kitty’s pancreatic enzyme levels. if it’s caught early enough, the solution is very inexpensive and not at all hard on the animal. it’s a powder you put on their food to replace the missing pancreatic enzyme.
and sometimes, you have to tell your very well-meaning vet “no, i’ve put my pet through enough. it’s time to let them go.” if i’d learned to use these words sooner, it would have saved us and Spooky so much suffering because the vets just didn’t want to give up. the thing is, there are some times where you just can’t win and you just can’t help them any more. it’s on us as rescuers and pet-parents to learn the difference between doing something we know will help the animals we’re the stewards of feel better and doing something because it will make US feel better. if it’s for you, think twice before you do it.
when my dad’s brother had his vet amputate his dog’s leg when she was diagnosed with bone cancer, even knowing that she’d only gain a few months and that radiation and chemo wouldn’t help at all. he did that for himself because he has always been a selfish man. he probably told himself he did it for her, but it was really because he couldn’t stand to be without her, even though the amputation hurt her quality of life during a large part of the very limited time she had left. he did her no favors, really. it would have been kinder and fairer to her to let her live out the time she had left with all 4 legs and no surgery to recover from, even though it meant he’d have had to say goodbye to her sooner. it was never a question of “if” he was going to have to say goodbye, but rather “how soon” that goodbye would come. her cancer had no cure and he KNEW that the surgery was only going to buy her a few months at best.
YES! letting go hurts. YES! it’s hard. YES! you will always miss that being in your life. … but it’s the choice you have to make when you take an animal into your life and make yourself its guardian. rescuing is about good stewardship of the creatures you’re trying to “save” and knowing when you have tried as much as you should. when you rescue, you HAVE to know you can’t win all the time. in fact, you’re lucky if you win even half the time. i’ve done rescue for almost 20 years. and i’ve lost a lot, but i learned something every time i lost. …. and if i learned anything in all that time, it’s that you sometimes have to be willing to lose in order for that creature you wanted to “save” to be able to win. and sometimes, for them, “winning” is being set free from the pain and confusion they experience in this life. sometimes, for them, “winning” is a kind and peaceful end. that’s a very hard truth to accept.
and, now, i’d better leave off here because i’ve got a lot to say about when you should be willing to let go.
Thank you so much for sharing what I too feel…….. People often keep animals because the vet says ” lets try this” almost as thought the animal were not going to be in pain during the experiment. I am a person who has had a long talk with my vet, and said enough…… For me it’s not about the expense, it’s about putting an animal through testing that serves no purpose, beyond the owner and the vet…We owe our beloved pets the dignity of dying before the pain takes over.
I am very lucky to have a vet that listens to me. If I go in and say its time…they will help my pet rest. They do not push for more testing, or even ask if I want to try something else. Only if I ask.
a great article …..I feel quite frustrated with the mentality “any life is better than no life” – not to the animal that is suffering daily in oh so many ways…..
Even dare mention the E word with some people and they just blast you for being inhumane….but am I really the inhuman one for pointing out the suffering.
Where I come from we recently had a controversy where an “animal Shelter” was raided by the Cruelty Society. the animals were examined by veterinarians, some of the animals that had been in their “care” were euthanased. There was an almighty outcry that the Society had overstepped the mark, after all the Shelter had “good intentions” but got overwhelmed……..if you are supposed to be in Rescue and you are getting “overwhelmed” then you need to reach out and not let the animals suffer, because you think you are the ONLY one that can help. I was one of the few people that stated the operator had a case to answer and suggested the Cruelty Society was in the right. I got heavily criticized….but at the court case, the operator did admit they had a case to answer.
My family has always been quick to make decisions about these sorts of things. None of us feels it fair to force an animal to live onwards while suffering just because we don’t want to let go.
My last cat was suffering under my watch her last few days and I feel such immense guilt about this even as I try to justify why her suffering was prolonged by a day in my lack of resources to get her to a vet to be put down.
There is always a chance she was suffering before but showed no outward signs of it beyond slowing down with age.
Thank you so much for writing this piece
We just had to put one of our dogs down. A beautiful min-pin mix named Max. He’d always had issues with his anal glands which his vet in California charged copious amounts of money for in treatments, special foods, etc. I took him for his “routine” treatment to a new vet here in Michigan. Turns out, it was cancer. The vet told me about various treatment options, the first being removal of that gland (confirmed the cancer diagnosis). I looked them up and this type of cancer is non-responsive to chemo/radiation…those will prolong the agony, but not get rid of the cancer. Usually, by the time the cancer is found and diagnosed, it has already metastasized. We had the operation to remove the gland in January. My husband and I told the vet then that we weren’t treating it any further. That if it got to the point that he was in pain, we were letting him go. The vet, whom I respect very highly, agreed. Max started getting sick in mid-March. It got to the point of him suffering on March 29th. On March 30th, our vet gave him his last shot while my husband and I stood there holding him, petting him, and telling him how much we loved him. And my heart is broken.
The selfish side of me just wants my baby back. I just want a little more time with him. But the loving side of me knows that this way, he didn’t suffer. This way, he is free of pain. He was a rescue and we gave him five years of happiness, love, and security. He knew that where we went, he went. How could I be so cruel as to drag him through senseless pain and suffering so I could have a few more days of his company? How would a few more days, with him utterly miserable, be of any value to either of us?
I just wish that things would be to the point where, when it comes my time, if it is filled with useless and uncurable pain and suffering, someone will love me enough to release me the same way we loved Max and released him.
it seems like fate lately, reading articles like this- deciding when has to be one of the hardest, most heart-breaking struggles a loving pet owner makes – but it is one of the most important. I know I feel that way about myself – and have been blunt with my kids – I won’t EVER get to the point where my quality of life is such that each day brings with it struggle, pain and despair – so why do we do that to our animals – who are, in the end, more stoic, accepting and forgiving? But god it is never easy.
I still ache about having to euthanize one of my most beloved dogs – a rescue – spent almost 2 years trying to rehabilitate – but he bit – everyone, all the time, didn’t matter he was tethered to myself or my husband, never gave warnings, one minute, happy go lucky grinning terrier, the next had taken a bloody chunk out of someone’s leg (never, ever mine – not even close – he NEVER even redirected a bite at me). In the end there was no choice and to this day (five years later) I still get choked and teary but there was no other way.
This past few months has been a nightmare – my Maxx, who I took on as a “pallative” (told he would last TOPS three months and he WAS 13.5 years old) had to be euthanized last month – three YEARS after I got him. My heart cat, Mulder, rescued when his litter was dumped in the snow in -30 in January (son’s friend found them and Mulder was the only one still alive), smuggled into work in my purse so I could feed him every hour, slept under the hair at the back of my neck… at 18 had to be put down when he suddenly developed an incredibly fast-acting cancer. My cat Kiki who had been on borrowed time for more than a year due to severe health issues had to go too – and in two weeks, my beautiful, loving Llyr is scheduled – with DM which is worsening by the day (we have managed it for 2 years now)- incontinent, in pain, has to be lifted up and down the three stairs to the back door, sometimes has to be lifted up from sitting – fed three times a day, a healthy mush I make up for him so he can digest it .. but the time has come.
I have struggled, still do because when all is said and done he still such a HAPPY dog… still thinks he can do what he has always done, still loves to ‘talk’ (albeit I taught him to use his “inside” voice!), still loves to eat his mush, bug the cats when they walk by him and generally embraces the life he has (there’s a lesson to us right there)- but when all is said and done, without his pain pills he is stoicly in pain, he can no longer and has not been able to go – on his beloved walks, everything is an effort and a struggle and emotionally – as a dog who has always felt it is his ‘job’ to guard the house, it is tearing him apart with anxiety he can no longer do that….
And I will say goodbye to him and be there holding him untinl he crosses and I have to believe my animals will be there when it is my time, waiting to greet me and say, ma, where have you BEEN!!
I work with a lot of rescues from a behavior stand point. Making tough decisions are always difficult; that is why I created a 3-5 hour presentation titled “In Whose Best Interest” where I use 16 LOGICAL variables to determine the adoptability and successful integration of behaviorally challenged dogs. I am constantly having to remind rescue groups that not many, if any, adopters truly want a ‘project’. And warehousing them in the name of ‘no kill’ is certainly NOT in the best interest of the dog.
Hi Karen – Is that presentation something public? I would be very interested in reading that. My group is a rescue for throw away hounds (primarily former hunting dogs). Most adapt quickly to being a pet and then we have had some at varying levels of what I would equate to PTSD. Some of those with medication and work had rebounded fairly well. Meaning that most days they are happy (storms, fireworks, etc are a different story). And then we have had a couple that have gone to sanctuary homes (care for life fosters) or adopted out to trainers or people experienced with this. I would love to get a hold of your presentation though, as I know at some point we could end up with a hound so severely “damaged” mentally that we would need to make decisions and so anything I can get my hands on to read is welcomed.
You have looked inside my head and taken out my thoughts on rescue and euthanasia. In 20 years, I have seen my share of misery and pain, and I have made that final walk done the vet’s hall way to many times to count. Love them, let them go, do not keep them in this world for yourself. Don’t be selfish.
Thanks for this article, however, you might want to update the euthanasia numbers. According to Wayne Pacelle, CEO of HSUS, 2.7 million pets were euthanized in the US in 2014, of which 70% were cats. If you do the math, that means that 810,000 other pets were euthanized, and dogs were a subset of the 810,000. More recent numbers from HSUS indicate the number of pets euthanized is down to 2.4 million. The figure of 2 million dogs euthanized a year cited in the article is no longer accurate.
The Current ASPCA information differs some from the HSUS number. The public numbers the ASPCA gives now lists: “Each year, approximately 2.7 million animals are euthanized (1.2 million dogs and 1.4 million cats),” http://www.aspca.org/animal-homelessness/shelter-intake-and-surrender/pet-statistics. This is a 2015 article, also, and the figures represented what the HSUS and ASPCA listed for 2014. Sadly, none of those number are especially accurate because many shelters do not report how many animals are euthanized in our state or surrounding states. If we are honest, far more than the public realizes are put down in pounds across rural communities.
Hi ,
this is a good article, and something I consider every day,
I rescued a pug (fostered to start) 10 yrs old from a back yard breeder, she had many litters and in a terrible state, 2 luxating patella , so much blood in urine, filthy dirty , living out side,
I wanted ( needed ) to show her love and care for her, our vet thought she had bladder cancer and a few short months to live, we got her on antibiotics and decided there was no point looking into at her legs, and vet seemed to think they were almost unrepairable.
She got better the blood stopped she was perky and full off life, we got her wheels And a buggy.
When we get her wheels out for a walk she goes mad! She can out run my other 4 pugs, when she is in the buggy she sits looking out and barking at anything new, she loves her food she plays with toys, she is on no pain meds , I think she is living life and is happy our vets say she seems very happy ,
So in answer to your post I do think every day WHEN? But I see her going mad while dinner is being prepared and excited to get in her wheels , loving her cuddles and I can’t do it, not yet she is still living the dream after a bad start in life, but I’m hoping I will know when the time is right.
It can be hard to tell sometimes. Sounds like she is loving the life, and making up for lost time! Let her! it should always be a quality of life scenario. When she is no longer excited about food, play, walks etc…the decline has begun. Then it is time to start looking at the real ‘when’. The hardest part may be knowing her well enough to tell when she is pushing past pain and discomfort to keep “enjoying”. That makes the decision harder because you will have to be the one who decides if she if better off pushing past that, or letting go. Not an easy decision sometimes.
One thing I read and try hard to remember (in my selfishness to want them to be with me always), I Love them and made that commitment to help them when the end is near, no matter how much it hurts me to let them go.
Also…better to be a day early than a day late….especially suffering may/is involved.
This article is SPOT ON!!! So many “rescuers” are caught up on “save them all” even if it means being stuck in a cage for the rest of their lives. Thank you for putting it into words.
Reblogged this on thebarnrules.
Well said. It is for purely selfish reasons that we keep an animal alive longer because we think we’re trying to “help” them….yet we’re not ready to actually HELP them by ending their suffering. I find myself frustrated with Vets who are not realistic & honest enough with owners. Instead these Vets recommend more & more tests, medications, specialty diagnostics, etc-all of which puts more money in their pockets!!
Working in animal welfare since 1990, I have seen the majority of cruelty cases in our area move from dog fighting and cock fighting, to animals having to be rescued from “Rescuers” turned hoarders. Often those with the best intentions are causing the most suffering. There are fates worse than humane euthanasia, and sadly we see them every day. It is time to wake up, no kill, while a goal that sounds wonderful, is not kindness when it causes suffering of such magnitude.
This post really strikes at the heart of the matter. What is best for the animal ? Especially when it comes mental soundness and saneness.
I had a stunning beautiful, well bred, well trained and well loved Quarter Horse mare. She was at the start a kind of rescue, for the mere fact she was so volatile, and bucked off three top rate cutting horse trainers that she was on her way to becoming rodeo stock. I took a chance and bought her, at a great discount from her $50,000 price tag. Got bucked off the first week I had her. But she made me really, REALLY take a journey into learning about behavior, and also ergonomics of horses ( which can effect behavior and cause issues if they are in chronic pain ). Needless to say, she turned around with the physical treatments we did for her and I competed for years on her, doing very well. I loved her, and she loved me. But, she simply was not a horse anyone could deal with because you had to negotiate with her, instead of making demands. She didn’t do “demands” She was no ones fool. But was she incredible when she respected you and you worked together. And she also was about the most affectionate horse I ever met too. If she trusted you.
She caught a horrible tick born disease ( anaplasmosis ) and spiked such a high fever, that it caused we suspect brain damage. She went from being a calm, sweet horse that really did do amazing things for me, to being suddenly agitated and increasingly trying to attack me with no provocation. I never, ever hit this horse in 16 years, but you would have thought she was defending her life. I ended up working with several vets, and 3 behavior specialists at different universities. All of them came to the same conclusion. I was playing with my own life by trying to solve what ever mental torment her fever had brought on in her brain. So I put her down. Hardest thing I ever did, because I can tell you, the day I did it, she was in a good mood, I fully groomed her, she was the perfection of health, and most would absolutely wonder if they didn’t know about her mental state why I was putting her down. I didn’t want anyone hurt, and also had to finally realize, she too was living in torment. And, she didn’t have a bucket list of what she wanted to accomplish. She only knew, at the moment of her end, the sun was out, she had been fed all her favorite foods, she was clean and pretty ( she loved being groomed ) and she went to sleep on her favorite patch of grass. Tough choices are what we must do if we really love our animals and respect them.
You have simply generalized, which is an uninformed opinion at best. You lump all who help animals into the same sentence.
As a sound off over the backyard fence your writing would suffice but not on a huge social medium. You have missed the point entirely about rescue.
Your opinion is just that and I hope it goes no further.
To be frank, yours is the uninformed opinion, and I think a short scroll through the comments will show, without any need from me to defend this solid opinion, how very misguided you really are. I do hope no animals suffer at the mercy of your version of rescue.
Thank you for your insightful article. I have an 18 year old Lab mix who has dementia and several other illnesses. Each day I wonder when she will tell me she is ready and that has not happened. I feel her quality of life is not what it once was and I cry at the thought of losing her, but in my heart I know I must do for her what is needed, which is freeing her from her pain. Yet sometimes she jumps and runs to the best of her ability and then I back off, but I know this cannot last and yet I am immobilized at the thought that perhaps I am wrong in my assessment. Your article has answered that question for me and I am preparing to do my part to free her from her prison. Thank you.
Such a great article! As you stated, animals are not making plans for tomorrow, they do not know about dying. I’ve had to euthanize several dogs, cats and horses. In every case my vet gave a tranquilizer first. Then they simply went to sleep. Was I sad yes, they were my children but keeping them alive would have been for me not them. I had a Paint gelding that I raised and he was my heart horse. But he foundered. I tried everything including special shoes etc, but my vet X-rayed him and he had rotated severly. He was in severe pain and spent most of his time lying down. It was one of the hardest things I ever did but I did it for him.
I do wish veterinarians would make euthanasia less costly and there were more options for burial or cremation. What do you do if you have a beloved horse who needs to be euthanized, what to do with the body? We need a less expensive solution.
Thank you for pointing out what we sometimes refuse to see.
Plain and simple, if an animal has no quality of life we should not keep it alive for our own selfish reasons. Animals live in the present and do not ponder mortality as we humans do. Animals are fortunate that their pain and suffering can be ended by euthanasia.Humans are less fortunate and have to suffer until their weary bodies cease to exist.. A month before My dad died at the age of 90 ,of congestive heart failure he said “its enough “
I am a sanctuary for geriatric, special needs and hospice pugs. Currently we have 14. I struggle with decisions about quality of life on a daily basis and I have held so many as I let them go with tears on their fur. I must speak up though that quality of life is not so easy to pin down. Myself, I have arthritis and lupus, I deal with chronic pain, but I don’t want to die. I can manage my pain and while I may not be able to do all of the things I could do at 25, I am far from ready to cash in. I have dogs who are paraplegic and with that comes incontinent. These dogs don’t lie in their own filth and misery though. I learned how to express their bladders and prevent chronic UTI’s. They are happy, clean, healthy and enjoy great quality of life despite their limitations. Those with arthritis get meds and supplements to relieve the inflammation and lessen pain. They may no longer be able to jump onto the couch or leap for a treat, but they happily amble about at their own pace. I have had many dogs with cancer, I have three now. I don’t do MRI’s or neurosurgery or chemo. But I do treat medically, give pain relief and monitor quality of life closely.
You can arbitrarily set standards for quality of life, but I don’t gauge it by their abilities or disabilities, but by whether they still respond to and enjoy affection, enjoy eating, and have an acceptable level of pain. I try to judge it by my own standards. I would not want to die simply because I became blind or mobility limited or incontinent, I would want help learning to cope with those things, I would want to take advantage of devices and medications to make those things easier to deal with. I would not want to die the day I was diagnosed with cancer, I would want to enjoy the time left doing the things that brought me peace and comfort and joy, and when I could no longer enjoy life, then I would want to go. If you look at pain on a scale of 1-10, I can easily put up with chronic pain in the 1-3 zone. And maybe even 4-5, Intermittent pain, even more, but once I hit 7 or so on a regular or constant basis, I think my ability to find life more enjoyable than pain was unpleasant would go, and I would want to go as well.
I recently had to put down a 16 year old with an unbelievably healthy body for her age, but her mind had gone. She had been deaf when she came to us at 12, then lost her eyesight suddenly and completely at 12 from SARDs. Her world was profoundly changed, lost in silence and darkness, we found ways to help her feel secure and safe, she still loved her food and responded to love and when you petted her would flop over for a belly scratch and wrinkle rub, but slowly, insidiously, dementia crept in and at some point I saw in her eyes that life was not enjoyable anymore. She responded less to affection and to food and she no longer sniffed and snuffled in the yard at potty times but just stood there not moving at all, not afraid, but just non-responsive. It was time. But she had 4 great years, even after both blindness and deafness rocked her world.
The dog in my avatar, Bailey, was 12 when she came to me, sick, old and hopeless with dead eyes, but with care and medication she did great and lived to be 19. I have a treasured video of her playing at 18. I’m glad I didn’t give up on her too soon way back when because she changed my life, helped me find my calling and inspired me to do what I do now and love.
Maybe it is because I am an atheist. I don’t believe in heaven or a Rainbow Bridge. I don’t believe our spirit or consciousness survives death. I don’t think we move on to a better place. So I want to hang around to see how things turn out as long as possible while life is bearable and pain is not so bad as to completely overtake the joy. I do the same for my babies here.
Yes, euthanasia is a gift, a powerful wonderful gift when the time comes. Yes, spending thousands to subject animals to invasive tests and surgeries with little hope of effecting a substantial long term benefit is wrong. Yes, some animals, like some humans, through genetics, trauma, brain injury or disease are vicious or mentally unstable and when love, security, training and behavior modification prove ineffective, often the kindest thing to do is euthanasia. But I do think we owe our companions the extra care that can come with age, disease and injury, if they can have a good quality of life in spite of those things. I support people surrendering animals to sanctuaries who have the skills, knowledge and time to devote to making their final years, months, weeks positive and happy – because those owners know they cannot provide what the animal needs themselves. I have so many stories, stories of recovery, stories of courage, stories of love, trust and bittersweet endings.
I try not to judge too harshly those I feel do too much or too little, because I think most of us in rescue try our best to do what is right in our hearts…
I’m in rescue and have said many times (after the first two years) there are worse fates than a humane euthanasia. I believe some animals, much like people, are born not “hard wired” correctly and some Are not able to overcome traum/abuse they sustained. What must their mental state be and that’s as important as physical state. I have made the tough call to euthanize a physically healthy animal that was in mental anguish on several occasions. It was the right decision each time. Heart breaking but right.
Thank you for saying what some many in rescue believe but are afraid to say.
Just because an animal can be “saved” does not mean it should. When I see repeatedly dogs , cats or horses being “rescued” that are severely damaged either mentally or physically . I have to wonder why? The idea that a dog that is multiply handicapped is kept alive on a regimine of meds in a little wheel chair dragging it’s self around & we still have people believing that this is perfectly fine & that the animal is “happy”! These types of rescues are done more for the person rescuing than for the animal . Instead of investing the time and money in bettering the lives of numerous healthy animals ( and preventing more thru spay & neuter clinics.) They still try to save all the disabled & critically ill animals as possible. The fact that anyone should have a pet and not understand that at some point in time you may be called to make the proper choice to euthanize ! It does not take a cold , heartless person to make this choice….It does take one with some common sense & one who truly cares.
Lisa your pretty amazing and I agree with everything you said . Pug love x
I agree. My family is split on those ideals. My mother’s side are the farmers who have animals put down the second they are dangerous, no longer have use due to age, or show any signs of suffering or future potential to suffer. Whereas my father’s side has kept animals alive too long selfishly because they cannot themselves deal with their own pain at losing a companion and keep the animals alive far too long. Thank god I take after my mother!
So very very true. It is so much more humane to euth a suffering animal than to rehab that animal through pain and suffering when the outcome will be a lifetime of pain and caged living. I hate to see them go, but it is so much better than seeing them suffer.
Excellent article. We need to learn the “euthanasia” is not always a four letter word (euphemistically speaking.)This is one reason I hate the terms “kill” and “no-kill” shelters. I am on the board of my local public shelter. Our staff makes heroic efforts to save the savable, treat the treatable and rehome the abandoned but we recognize that some dogs are just too dangerous, too sick or too old to find new loving homes. We do the humane thing and are criticized for it – some people will not donate to us because of it.. Recently, we pulled some dogs from a “no-kill” shelter that was over-crowded when we had extra space. One turned out to be vicious and actually killed another dog. We told the no-kill shelter that we could not, in good conscience, adopt it out. I, as an attorney and risk manager, would not have allowed it anyway. The “no-kill” shelter would not let us euthanize but took the dog back and is advertising it for adoption on its website. It is a disaster waiting to happen because they simply will not do the right thing. I am facing this issue personally as well. I have a 13 1/2 old Pointer who is nearing the end of his life. He still has good quality of life and is pain-free but the day is coming when that will not be the case. I have no plan for more surgery or more therapy or more drugs. When that day comes, as painful as it will be, I will do the right thing. The author is correct – dogs live in the here and now – they don’t worry about tomorrow. If we cannot give them a quality here and now, we owe them the mercy of a painless euthanasia.
A great article!
I have seen hundreds of animals suffer because of “selfishness” or for the ability to say that we are “no-kill”. The selfishness comes from people refusing to acknowledge that sometime the suffering just needs to end, and they refuse to “let go” because they “can’t live without the pet”. The “no-kill” movement has placed thousands of animals in harms way. I constantly read news articles from around the country about the rescues, shelters and individuals who think that they can save them all. While I agree we should save as many as we can, we shouldn’t allow others to suffer in cages or unsanitary conditions for either “selfishness” or for the “no-kill movement”. Even terminally ill people have the right to die with dignity.
People behind the no-kill movement do very little to assist in rescuing animals. They don’t volunteer at a shelter because they can’t stand seeing the animals suffer. (A lot of times they are the one that placed the animal in that situation because of their demand “no-kill” policy. Their advocacy consist of attacking those that are attempting to do the work with criticism and hatred.
I worked in a shelter once that was so disgusting that I had to resign after I witnessed that the no-kill people would rather see animals suffer, than be euthanized. The shelter had a capacity to hold approximately 80 animals. On any given day there were 170 plus animals in the facility. Conditions were beyond poor and inhumane. There were 2 kennel technicians to care for the 170 animals within a total of 8 hours. You can only image the inadequate quality of care and treatment the animals received. After repeatedly requesting more staff and being denied, I resigned.
While at the facility I took the loudest no-kill advocate through the shelter and showed him the deplorable conditions (cages overcrowded, sick animals, cats and dogs in the same area) and I asked him if he considered that humane. His response was “its better than dead”.
I realized at that moment the mentality that I was facing. This man pushed the issue of sending animals to rescues without knowing the conditions in which animals in the rescue were living. After I left the facility, I learned that 2 of the individuals that were pulling animals from our shelter were hoarding them. Prior to my resignation I asked the administration what these individuals were doing with all these animals. Their response was “don’t worry about it, they (the animals) are leaving and not being euthanized, so its keeping people off your back”.
While I agree that all animals should be rehomed if adoptable, I also believe that animals are “entitled to a humane life or humane death.” Being housed in inhumane conditions, not socialized and allowed to deteriorate day after day is NOT humane.
amazing & I thought I was the only one …
I am always surprised when rescues and individuals pick the sick dog or the crippled horse to save when right next to them goes a perfectly healthy animals to euthanasia or slaughter. It should be the other way around. The parvo puppy or the lame horse has a very poor prognosis while the healthy animal should be the first to be rescued. They can be more easily helped to find their forever home. Yes, you might be able to save the others but how much money will be spent to cure them. It may be enough to save several animals instead of the one. Just the opinion of an old farm girl who has rescued a few animals in my own life.
Brilliant. Thank you! We put our beloved pony to sleep after watching him struggle through two tough winters. We said there wouldn’t be another one. We let him enjoy his summer and euthanised him in October as the weather was changing. We were all, present, we all cried, we held him till we were sure he was gone. I’m crying again now, writing. Our horsy neighbours on both sides did not approve. Called me a hypocrite (because I say I love horses) and a murderer. They still don’t really speak to me, a year on. It’s been so tough. But I’m still sure I did the right thing. Thank you for your words. They are balm to my bruised soul.